by Celia Rivenbark | Jan 13, 2020 | Weekly Column
Am I the only one who thinks it would’ve been hilarious if someone at the recent Golden Globes had frowned in disgust and hissed at the waiter: “I had the STEAK!” when the vegan meal was presented with a flourish? Turnabout’s fair play...
by Celia Rivenbark | Jan 6, 2020 | Weekly Column
THE JURY POOL, COUNTY COURTHOUSE, USA— Bailiff: Mr. McConnell, you and Mr. Graham are up next. Please just step through the doors to the courtroom and prepare for your voir dire. Mr. Graham: Voir who? What kinda commie talk is that? Look, I was raised an...
by Celia Rivenbark | Dec 23, 2019 | Weekly Column
This week on The Hallmark Channel…A lesbian couple’s wedding enrages backward town folk who find their audacious display of affection threatening in a flat-earth kinda way. Meanwhile, as snow falls gently upon the happily ignorant hamlet of Bigotsville,...
by Celia Rivenbark | Dec 16, 2019 | Weekly Column
To those of you who wonder (often using your outdoor voice, by the way) why I write so often about President Trump, let me give you a hint: He recently said Americans have to flush the toilet “10 to 15 times” because modern, low-flush toilets...
by Celia Rivenbark | Dec 9, 2019 | Weekly Column
Like any normal American woman who lives off snark and Little Debbie Raisin Cakes, I was completely mystified the first time I saw the now famous Peloton ad. Why does that pretty lil waif look so worried when her controlling 50 shades of stupid husband gives...
by Celia Rivenbark | Dec 4, 2019 | Weekly Column
‘Twas the month before new year and all through the House Were rumblings of impeachment: “Get rid of the louse!” With eyes all a-buggin’, Adam Schiff grew most shrill When war heroes were mocked up on Capitol Hill Nunes and Jordan,...
