by Celia Rivenbark | Jan 18, 2021 | Weekly Column
Melania: Donald, eez time to go. Wakey wakey. DT: I’m not leaving. I won the election by 200 million votes. Everyone says so. Please tell the movers to go away… Eric: Dad? It’s time to go. Look, I know we fought hard… DT: Who...
by Celia Rivenbark | Jan 11, 2021 | Weekly Column
In the beginning, there was Covid shaming and it was dark, judgy and unpleasant. We learned that we are very good at, biblically speaking, whining about the sawdust in our brother’s eye and paying no attention to the log in our own. You have Covid?...
by Celia Rivenbark | Jan 4, 2021 | Weekly Column
Welcome, welcome 2021! Please, come in. Take a (viral) load off. Put your feet up. Quarantini? I just finished Netflix so I’ve got plenty of time to talk about resolutions and such. Go on and get comfy in that ridiculously uncomfortable “treat...
by Celia Rivenbark | Dec 28, 2020 | Weekly Column
As I watched Lindsey Graham roll up his sleeve, the needle piercing his pasty, floppy upper arm meat, I seethed. Same for Marco Rubio, who managed to look smug from behind a mask as his Covid 19 vaccine was administered. Mike Pence emerged from his usual...
by Celia Rivenbark | Dec 21, 2020 | Weekly Column
The whole “Dr. Jill Biden” kerfuffle is, of course, ridiculous. She earned a doctorate in education and she should be called “Dr. Biden” without anyone’s snarky judgment. It reminds me of that wonderful scene in “Bull...
by Celia Rivenbark | Dec 14, 2020 | Weekly Column
Like many of you clinging to normal during this Covid Christmas season, I’ve been watching more than my share of Hallmark movies. November brain enjoyed the brilliant, dark, unsettling portrait of an orphaned chess prodigy but December brain wants only...
by Celia Rivenbark | Dec 7, 2020 | Weekly Column
Christmas came early this year. In fact, I can pinpoint the exact date—November 3—when my present was confirmed with a ship date of Jan. 20. All good. I can wait. I’ve been without an oven for three months now so, yeah, there’s that. Now it was time...
by Celia Rivenbark | Nov 30, 2020 | Weekly Column
In the spirit of keeping my friends close and my enemies closer, I maintain a rogue email account for updates from the Trump folks. Usually, it’s good for nothing more than a few laughs like the time Eric promised to mail me a “special hat”...
by Celia Rivenbark | Nov 23, 2020 | Weekly Column
The elderly woman approached our table, her arm hooked through that of a younger companion, probably her daughter, who was wearing a MAGA mask 12 days post Biden victory. “Ahhhh! Here’s some folks who like President Trump!” the older...
by Celia Rivenbark | Nov 16, 2020 | Weekly Column
I was sure I had won. How could I lose the election? I had all the best words. My campaign posters for homeroom student council representative used NEON posterboard. That sort of next-level campaigning always pays off. Yet, when the votes were tabulated, I...